Life seems a little hectic, right now I should be working… or planning… or spending time with someone. I’m one of those soak in the moment girls and it seems like the moments keep slipping away. The month of June came out of nowhere and then flew by… all I want is to enjoy this season.
I work full time for a Missions Agency and the summer is our busiest time, because it’s prime time for everyone to go during summer break. So here everyone is rushing, kind of stressed, looks a little tired, and could probably use one more cup of coffee. This is my last season like this, in this place… I want to care more, do more, love deeper, and finish stronger.
I am currently planning a wedding for September… which means if it’s not color swatches, it’s food samples… if it’s not invitations then it’s the guest list. There is so much excitement and joy, there are moments of peace often interrupted with a thought that was too late in its arrival…. I forgot that person that I love or I completely missed that appointment…. Or I STILL need to figure this out….
Besides the fact that I am engaged, I live in a house of 4… 3 of us are engaged and getting married all within nearly a month of each other. So all of those emotions, all the questions, planning, finding the perfect centerpiece idea, and moments of stress… we should multiply that by 3. Yes, our house is the place to be when it comes to love and weddings.
It seems that also in this busy season you want to grasp tight to your friendships and spend every ounce of time with people because this is the last season you get like this one. I also always have the desire to wake up earlier because that is when it is quiet. Even if I just stay in bed, in the quiet for an hour… hmmm, I soaked in the day a little bit more. I “go to bed early” just so I can lay in bed and think about the things I did that day. I want to think through the moments.
One thing I can say ever so confidently is that I’m going to want to remember this season perfectly. I want to remember being ridiculous about the guest list with my mom, I want to remember talking about a bow tie for 45 minutes with my fiancé, I want to remember when my invitations weren’t right and I had a minor freak out…when we have dates and don’t talk at all about the wedding, I want to remember when someone comes into my office for a question about life instead of work.
I want to soak in the moments of pure bliss and panic.
In response to this business I have cried a little bit, I always think tears are a good thing though. I have planted flowers so I could watch them bloom. I have scheduled, I have stat in complete silence, I have captured beautiful things, and filled my heart and room to the brim with things that bring me joy. I have even had more time for the One that always refreshes me most.
The best way to describe it all is beautiful, messy, and extravagant. And the best advice I can give myself is take the time living requires. To live is so grand an adventure and to look back and all that can be seen is a busy whirlwind would be a missed opportunity to embrace beauty.
Have moments everyday alone to think, don’t make the decision right away, give every moment everything that you have…. At work, in ministry, in planning, in relationships, and most definitely in the quiet.
So all of this to say, you (busyness) won’t get the best of this girl. I am determined to love each day, and even you can’t take joy away from this gift of life.
with grace & poise,
a woman who isn’t TOO busy to live well